That most likely is a side effect of the change to your config file that Dave suggested:
Add these 2 lines to ~/Library/Preferences/VMware Fusion/config
mainmem.backing = "swap"
mainmem.useNamedFile = "FALSE"
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indeed these two settings in my vmx config did cause this. but I really don't understand why this problem did not show immediately. after I changed this first it did seem to work, since I could suspend and continue. but now I can reproduce the issue by putting the options in and fix it by removing them again.
anyway, without then it works again.