a quick answer:
1. first of all, you need to make sure to have correct pairs of HCA firmware and vSphere native IB driver versions for your vSphere release. You can find it in VMware website, hardware compatibility page.
2. install the correct version of MFT for vSphere from Mellanox and make sure everything to work smoothly - the most important: make sure HCA linkUP and HCA port type -> 2 !!!
3. read the vSphere networking configuration document, the PVRDMA section
4. try-and-error
for your question#1, yes you'd better google "pvrdma guest driver"
for your question #3, AFAIK, Yes and true for 6.5&6.7.