I'm guessing it's just a BIOS setting - Dell is pretty good at making extra money by charging people small change for making things easier for them (don't have a problem with that practice - I think it's a great value-add to allow clients to customise BIOS defaults pre-delivery.)
Regardless, the ESX iSCSI initiator doesn't currently support TOE or jumbo frames, so you'll get no performance benefit out of it for that purpose. It may (or may not) change in future, but VMware have given no indication as to when this might take place.