Looking at moving it to Physical instead because I can't give it any more vCPUs without upgrading the Windows version and SQL version.
Well A) did you run capacity planner on this box BEFORE you attempted to run it on Virtual? Not all applications are candidates for Virtualization. No where will you find that Virtualization REPLACES Physical hardware for performance. B) Virtual Environments are for one thing, and one thing only, consolidation. Virtual machines do not replace or meet physical machines for performance.
You should talk to the sales guys. They'll tell you EVERYTHING should be virtualized. 
To answer the question, no I did not run capacity planner. I don't own it, and by my understanding, capacity planner analyzes an existing physical workload. These apps were never run physical. Vendor said virtual should be OK, and I guess it is. The app runs - just not that fast.
>VMs are easier to manage, and make OS more accessible, while saving you power and space. Physical machines however need their own power and separate management (KVM, separate keyboard / monitor, etc...).
Got that, thanks. Physical machines don't need like 45 IO connections, either, though! 
Did you get help with Virtualization before you moved to this environment or did you do this via trial and error, this seems like you are trying this or that before you fully understand how Virtualization works.
I've been using Vmware since ESX 2.0, I know how virtualization works just fine. But what good is all the marketing nonsense about 8vCPU mean anything, when 8vCPU is really only 1.33-2 real CPUs? Like I said, I am just getting frustrated. Management pushes virtualization, users want performance. And I am finding "high-performance VM" is a bit of an oxymoron.
And I am finding "high-performance VM" is a bit of an oxymoron.
Well yes and no. I have the same argument when people ask for things like green ketchup, and 100 brands of cereal. Appease the public, just so they shut up! Who asked for this stuff, and better yet, who buys it?
You want 8 CPU in a VM, here you go! Knock yourself out. You want a million dollars, here you go, but it won't make you happy.. people need to learn some things for themselves.. like Virtualizing an app that LOOKS like a physical server doesn't mean it will PERFORM like a physical server, but if they just gave VM's 1 vCPU nobody would take it serious, so when people see the bells and whistles and same functions as a REAL server, well then they have something to compare it to.
And I always believe that just because something is there, you don't necessarily have to trip over it.. Knowledge is power, and that's why these experts are here, to explain when you have a problem, they help sort it out. So you did the right thing, you posted your question, now you will get the answer to make it work right.
Sales people have the same problem around the world, they PUSH you to BUY, they don't care if it works or not. Sales people PUSH software, hardware isn't working, throw more hardware at it, that will fix it! Not a good solution.
Technically speaking VM Ware will get you 90% of everything you need, it's the 90 / 10 rule, 10% of your VM's are 90% of the problem, we just have to figure what to fix to make the VM's (and their users) happy....
Got that, thanks. Physical machines don't need like 45 IO connections, either, though!
Pound for Pound consider the BIG picture, host servers need a LOT less connections then the Physical counterpart.. when you consider a properly built ESX machine can host 40-100 similar Physical environments.
We should adopt this as the "communities" motto... That's fantastic!
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Where do I sign to receive my royalties check?
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Dustin Pike
VMware Certified Professional (VI3 & vSphere)