Update.
I did a little more testing by running up a FreeBSD VM (which is the OS FreeNAS is based on, still could not see the adapter in pass through. I know from installing on stand-alone hardware that it will see it and use it automatically when on a dedicated hardware.
I also ran up my Ubuntu desktop VM and it could see and use it in pass through just fine.
Finally, after looking around I found some posts about having to compile drivers for it (not necessary when installed on stand-alone hardware), I tried and it failed saying something about "no free irq's". Couldn't find much more information on that problem.
I switched it back to a VM provided device and did some testing and found I was getting iperf speeds of 9+Gb/s so I went forward with it like that which is fine.
Still interested in understanding why it wouldn't work on FreeBSD but did on Windows & Ubuntu.
Roveer